I'm Sorry

for that last post I wrote.  Wow, I think that was a low point in my life.  I decided to just keep it up there, because we all need reminders of our mistakes, right? Like, if there was a picture of the Japanese American internment camps on Bush’s desk when he was deciding to sign the Patriot Act after 9/11, maybe he would have at least paused for a little and thought to himself, "Funny, something about this is so deja vu!  ….Ah well, fuck it."   And then promptly proceeded to repeat the mistakes of the past.  Anyway….

Shortly after writing that post and running around the office talking/hallucinating at as many unsuspecting people as I could find, I stopped being drunk and started being severely hung over.  I feebly oozed out of the office and to the nearest Asian restaurant. 

I heard somewhere that pho cures hangovers.  Too bad this was a Thai place.  That didn’t really register with me, the sledgehammers to my brain meant there was no room left for “comprehension”. 

I asked the lady at the counter for soup.  She asked what kind.  I said the closest thing they had to pho.  She looked really annoyed, like I probably breached some form of cultural etiquette, which I’m 100% sure I did along with the thousands of ignorant white people before me. 

I almost broke down at this point because clearly I wasn’t getting pho, my head was being repeatedly slammed by Death itself, and in the process I managed to insult an entire peoples’ culture.  I said helplessly, “I just have a really bad hangover, what is the best soup for that?”

At this, she instantly became enthusiastic and beamed, “Our Tom Yum is perfect for hangover!”

Yes, a miracle.

Then she frowned and said, “But… why you hungover on a Wednesday? You were drinking on Tuesday night???” She said it that incredulously, like she was unable to believe someone would be that stupid and irresponsible to party at the beginning of the work week.

Therefore making me feel even more ashamed of myself than I was before.

Anyway, lesson re-learned.  After that, I went back home and attempted to scrape the dirt out of my carpet.  Who says college years are the craziest?